Welcome to Find Your Nudge

This is a scenic route you may want to follow

As I welcome you into my internet home, Your Nudge, let me introduce myself. I am Robin. I am a semi-retired registered counselling psychologist working in the UK.

You have just noticed my ‘welcome’ picture. This illustration shows one scenic route shaped by choices you and I make in our lives. I’ll be taking this picture apart to show how the website is structured and how it might work for you.

Before I say more about that, I’d like you to help me explore a practical way to just notice how this picture can be used. I like offering choices and I am starting out with an immediate choice for you.

you can accept my word of encouragement and read on

…. or

you can touch on this hyperlink and use this website in a different way

…. there is at least one other option …..

some people will have left off consulting this website already!

That’s fine; there’s a lot of material ahead to explore but it will be of value to only some readers.

So for those wanting to go one with this enquiry

….. I’d ask you to go back to the picture and consider what a ‘nudge’ is:

NUDGE ONE: going back and forth between my picture and my words here: that’s one nudge from me.

NUDGE TWO: Take another look at the illustration. Notice one specific detail that catches your eye. If you do this, then the choice you make is your own nudge.

NUDGE THREE: Stop for a moment: make a mental note of how do you respond to the detail you lighted on? Perhaps with excitement, anxiety, puzzlement or what? I cannot know; only offer up a few suggestions. Here I offer a nudge – without knowing what the outcome is for you.

NUDGE FOUR: View the picture once more.

Make a mental note of the specific mention of ‘obstacles’. With that, you may become aware of an obstacle in your present life. Having ‘just noticed’ that obstacle, make a brief written note of the thoughts, feelings and sensations that arise when some ‘obstacles’ on your present scenic route are brought to mind.

This action is a small, safe experiment called a Body Scan. The ‘four’ nudges to date provide opportunities you may choose to pursue, or not.

NUDGE FIVE: consider if there is just one small thing you might do this afternoon or tomorrow that helps you manage that obstacle just a little bit differently. Here is a potential nudge that only you can generate.

The rest of this website develops many specific nudges, or small, safe experiments, in greater depth. Using them may enable you to build on the successes you discover.

When you meet an obstacle, or a temporary small defeats, it is possible to help ourselves to learn or change.

As the saying goes: any journey, however long, starts with the first step. You are – as of now – already on a journey.

So let’s take a sixth step.

If this web site says anything, it is that you can make a difference for yourself. The information in it, and the contributions from so many people, are focused on maximising the chance of doing something just a little bit different.

A good starting point might be a First Nudge where I say more about ‘just noticing’. That’s a suggestion, not a requirement; as long as you continue to explore this website you can identify tools best suited for your own personal development – at your own pace, and in your own way. 

However, some of the pages may have an emotional impact on you. Therefore, you may want to work on your personal development with a consultant. The important thing is to find some-one reliable and discreet outside your immediate circle of friends or family.

For some outcomes or challenges, you may conclude that the support of a well-qualified therapeutic practitioner is necessary.

You could decide whether to include Dr Mason or myself via a free initial consultation.

SUMMARY 

The website is made up of a number of small, safe experiments.

I’ll admit there are a lot of words and illustrations spread throughout this website. This is difficult to avoid as I want you to have quite a few choices when designing your own safe experiment.

Therefore, please let me know if the detail helps or hinders you in planning any changes in your life. I make several changes to the website each week, and would like to include your suggestions.

You can get in touch directly on the contact form, below. One of my aims is to improve my approach with your feedback. Many people have provided this already.

If you are to ask to visit me in person, then you may be interested in my background.  As I work in a partnership, you will find details relating to Dr Christina Mason. She is a psycho-therapist and my tolerant wife.

You can subscribe to my work via the form, below, or read on – to my ‘letter’ to you.

If you want to know more about us, do take a look at: What more can we offer?

…… with the one important consideration: I cannot do the work for you.

Now to take apart that scenic route. To see how I do this please visit this page. An alternative action can be to follow some other leads.

I am including a few here to make a start.

Leads you may find helpful

Taking the scenic route apart

The inverted tree and Body Scanning as a starting safe experiment

How to design small, safe experiments

What’s so important about the SMALL in Small Defeats and Small Victories?

Relaxation techniques

Body Scanning and ‘thinking-about-breathing’

A practical example putting it all together

….. and a page to explore every entry on this website (now there’s a challenge!) at:

An index of all pages and posts

….. and, after you have done a few safe experiments, consider:

how will you review the work you have done

…… and how you might come to just one end of some work.

Happy Hunting. If you want a different lead to support some of what I am saying on this website, consider the BBC broadcast by David Robson called The Expectation Effect.

See: https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/series/m00199wp?partner=uk.co.bbc&origin=share-mobile

He touches on a number of nudges that are available to human beings. He offers the additional warning that any safe experiment will need to take account of “unconscious inference” – that is, we see what we predict, rather than what is out there.

Humans are, as I say on a few occasions, meaning-making creatures who can – literally – make things up. Yet this Achillese Heel does not have to stop us being sceptical and creative in order to bring about changes WE want to make.

You’ve come a long way through this Welcome page. If it has made you curious, you can subscribe to my ‘no strings’ weekly email here:

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