My web site places emphasis on action – getting something done.
So here’s a bit of heresy against myself. Action is not always enough or appropriate to the moment!
How so, and when?
Doing is not always a respectable word in therapy as action does not always ‘bring home the bacon’. Action can be a substitute for ‘real’ change in some situations – a handy disguise – a diversion. We can pretend to be changing. Do you notice when you run around like the proverbial ‘headless chicken’, getting no-where very fast?
Ever heard of the French expression: “plus ça change, plus c’est la même chose“. Roughly: the more it changes, the more it’s the same thing.
One reason why safe experiments may not work is that our cunning minds find actions-of-convenience that are, in truth, sneaky avoidances. One way to face this possibility is to use words, not actions. Socrates, an ancient Greek was great at this. Socrates was a philosopher and he had something useful to say about questioning ourselves and others. His famous sayings include:
An unexamined life is not worth living; and,
You will see the similarity between this work-sheet and other cognitive behavioural approaches to testing information.
So what other things did Socrates say that seemed to help others? For example, he used Ironic Modesty: once he was challenged by a claim that “No one is wiser than you.” He tried to disclaim the award, but ended up concluding that his wisdom was greater as he possessed awareness of his own ignorance.
His great skill was the Questioning Habit in his conversations with others (see item 7 for more practical ideas on ‘questions’ – way down the hyper-linked page). Socrates was argumentative and cross-examined others to improve our self-knowledge. He was said to be devoted to the truth so much so that he died rather than give up his philosophy and his home. He was obliged to poison himself when a jury of his peers convicted him of being too clever by half! He believed in the power of reason and, after his conviction, he was said to have continued to argue about his fate after death.
He saw the sneakiness of his fellows and appeared to test himself to the death.
To become more aware of our own sneakiness requires us to pay attention to our thoughts, beliefs, values and attitudes. In these areas, the experiments you may have to do are thought-experiments. Albert Einstein was the celebrity thought-experimenter and you can find out more about them at:
To work on inoculating yourself, try saying ‘hello‘ to your own sneakiness and just notice the ways in which you are sneaky. Notice all the benefits of sneakiness to you and consider whether sneaky may, indeed, help you from time to time and, if so, how.
When you find a way in which sneaky is getting in the way of your preferred change, go back to this web site and design a safe experiment once more. Let Socrates keep whispering in your ear.
One of the principles I have mentioned is that no ‘safe experiment’ will always work for everybody or even work always for some people. The most sensible thing to expect is that all experiments can work for some people, some of the time.
Sometimes it helps to think about things and to just notice our thoughts. A problem, when designing your own safe experiments, may well be to decide what to record and how to record it. So, now back to actions, once more.
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